Prayer Life

Here are some great questions to ask yourself.

1) Are you satisfied with your prayer life?
Yes No

2) Do you always pray with confidence, expecting God to answer?
Yes No

3) When someone asks you to pray for him or her, do you actually do it?
Yes No

4) If you were asked to name four or five specific requests you asked of God this week, could you do that?
Yes No

5) Is your time in the Word of God balanced with meaningful prayer?
Yes No

A Great Workout

When you physically workout hard, your body significantly changes. It becomes more defined, stronger and your endurance goes through the roof. Well, the same concept applies when you commit to working out with God. He will define your character, make you stronger, and provide incredible endurance when needed. But, you have to workout with Him. So, how do you workout with God?

1) Prayer
2) Journaling
3) Quiet Time
4) Worship
5) Small Group
6) Plugging into a Church

However, jumping from one activity to another does not necessarily provide you the best results. Your form is critical! Are you exercising with good form or are you just getting exhausted by going through the motions. You can spend 30 minutes with good form and get much better results then if you spent 3 hours workout with bad form. Make sure your form is solid by training with others that demonstrate good form.

Power of The Holy Spirit

Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that you will abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. - Romans 15:13

The above verse is extremely powerful to say the least. We often don't realize how powerful the Holy Spirit is living inside of us. Only the power of the Holy Spirit can create the joy, peace, hope, and love we desire to harness. Emotional freedom comes from experiencing the joy of the Lord, not from the temporary feeling of happiness created from engaging in enjoyable activities or experiencing positive circumstances. The Holy Spirit lives in each of us. This is how we truly know when there is a green light or red light when making decisions. You always have a sense to which direction God is leading. Your sensing becomes stronger the closer you draw near to God. At the same time, your sensing can become weaker the farther you are away from God. Whether we decide to listen to His lead is a choice we all have to make. Freewill grants us the option to ignore the Holy Spirit completely. This is something many of us do often. If you are feeling no peace, joy, hope and love, this is a good indication you are not listing to God and the Holy Spirit which lives inside you. In addition, the joy and peace derived from the Holy Spirit has the power to suppress all doubts and fears. Spend time with the Lord and listen for the Holy Spirit to give you guidance and joy. For me, the only time I fear or doubt is when I am not leaning into God, and listening for the Holy Spirit to grant me peace and joy. It's a journey; I fear and have doubt just like everyone else. But, I can sense myself getting closer everyday to feeling less fear and having less doubt. Only because, everyday I am growing in my faith and trusting in the Lord for everything.

Prayer:
Lord, I pray you grow the presence of the Holy Spirit inside of me and anyone who you lead to read this prayer. I need to have a keen awareness of how to navigate all my adverse circumstances and blessings with You at the Helm. I want to continue to experience the abundance of joy, peace, hope, and love only You can offer. I can believe with all my heart and soul I have nothing to fear or doubt as long as I am listening for the Holy Spirit, and carrying out Your purpose for my life. Don't allow my circumstances or activities to be the measuring stick of my peace, hope and joy. Through the Holy Spirit, You alone make me whole. I only desire to fear You Father. And, You alone! Amen.

Survival of the Fittest

Currently, we are all faced with an overwhelming amount of challenges. Our lives have become one big game of "Survival of the Fittest". Expectations at work and home can make you feel like surviving is all you can do at this point. Debt and financial pressure is something most individuals and families are faced with right now. Why are we drowning and gasping for air? Can you relate to this feeling? Well, the main reason you are feeling this way is because you are fighting with a BIG GOD. He is much bigger then you. Therefore, you don't stand a chance! If you want peace, you must fully surrender and start being obedient regardless of your circumstances. Sometimes, this seems much easier said then done, but definitely not impossible. ...With God all things are possible - Matthew 19:26. I have found He will keep you right where you are at until you are ready to surrender completely. In many cases, people think they have surrendered, and don't realize they really haven't. The irony, brokenness is a sign of how much He loves you. God's love is perfect! Don't be afraid of brokenness, embrace it. The heart is prepared to grow when it is broken. Understand, with God there is no coexistence, negotiation or copiloting. He is the captain and you are the mate. Our flesh keeps trying to place us in the captain's chair.

When in survival mode we become angry, have loss of control, become depressed, have doubt, anxiety, fear, and unbelief. Therefore, we must train ourselves to overcome. Overcome the lies, the unbelief, and fears. God's purpose is to use our life as a training ground to better understand who He is and what the Kingdom can offer. The goal of the training is to demonstrate what Adam and Eve had before they introduced sin, God's perfection. Therefore, the act of overcoming means you should have peace when you shouldn't, control over responses, breakthrough personal growth opportunities, and freedom from any fears or bondage. I don't have a 10 step process to share with you to fix the feeling of survival. All I can recommend is to get on your knees and relinquish control.

Recommended Prayer:
Father, I can't do this life without you. I don't want to live in survival mode anymore. Teach me your ways. Give me the strength to overcome. I don't want to just survive in this world. I want to flourish by honoring, obeying, and surrendering to you. In Jesus name I pray. Amen!

Cancer Killed by Love

I recently received the following story in an email and thought it was worth sharing.

Yesterday I had a pretty severe "Mohs" surgery on the left side of my face! Yes, it turns out that a lifetime of surfing comes with a downside. Having my face directly exposed to the sun for five decades is a lot like sticking your head in a microwave. When I started surfing in the 1960's, there was no such thing as sun block. Coppertone was for sissies. So I was tattooed with non-malignant skin cancer on my left temple which if untreated would take over my face like a wine stain on a white linen napkin.

My doctor explained that the surgery would take place in several rounds. Each time 2 millimeters of skin is removed and examined in a lab. The face scraping continues until all the bad-boy cancer cells are removed.

The lab time between each "mowing" is 2 to 3 hours. The doctor said 3 to 4 rounds of surgery are common. So the actual surgeries are brief, but the waiting in between time is eternal. They told me to pack a lunch. Since this was virtually an all day commitment, I showed up with a briefcase full of work to pass the time and boundless optimism that all of this would be nothing more than a flesh wound. I felt like Jack Bauer. No problem.

Round One went as expected. But 2 hours later the lab results revealed that the cancer was much bigger under the skin than on the surface. What was going to be nickel-sized lawn on my face turned into a silver-dollar size cancer estate complete with potential nerve damage and skin grafts and sagging eyebrow. My Clint Eastwood evaporated into Napoleon Dynamite.

Fortunately, my wife was sitting next to me. I had insisted she not wait with me. I had my work you see. This was nothing I had told her. "I'll call you when it's over." She knew better. When she senses things my logic doesn't see, she doesn't argue; she just does what she must. She doesn't ask my permission. So she waited with me. When I came out of the surgery room with a big pressure bandage on my head after learning of the global nature of the gang of terrorist cancer cells, she gave me her "love look" and closed her eyes and took my hand. I could feel her prayers. I could fill her grace. And finally, I could feel her confidence. We went outside and went for a walk. In her powerful, quiet way, she reassured me. I am lucky to have a wife whose fierce loyalty is irrational. If my face sagged like a bag of sand and I became clinically depressed, she would be at my side. Not out of duty or guilt, but out of grade-A, 100% pure love. She is my constant compassionate cheerleader.

Today there are a growing number of people who insist human beings are noting more than bodies. That what we call love is simply brain chemistry. But on days like yesterday, it seems like some eyes are tightly closed, and not able to see truth. Real love is beyond the feeling of love. In moments like yesterday that gives meaning and reason for everything.

Oh yes, the second round of "mowing" cut out all those pesky, perverted cells. I was clear! I got 30 stitches and no nerve damage. That's of course great, but not the point. I am old enough to know that a loving wife and heart-felt prayers don't always result in getting what we want. My dad died of cancer in spite of my mother's constant prayers and loving attention and in spite of my younger brother's heroic help. The point is, there is something more to real love than our material selves. Through adversity we experience life in a way that confirms we are human because of our spirit not because of our body. Perhaps this is the reason we have such moments. Love. Without it there is no happiness. With it there is no emptiness.

Will Marre

Identity Theft

Have you been robbed of your identity? Are you trying to answer questions such as:

• Who am I?
• What should I be doing?
• How can I feel happier since my happy meter is not very high right now?

The world and God have much different approaches to finding, retaining, and growing identity. People are the only creators God created who need to make an identity choice. All other creators are pre-programmed. He did not want us to be robots, but he does want us to choose Him for who we identify with. The world will tell you your identity is found in your profession and accomplishments. This is why the first question we ask each other when first meeting is, what do you do? Typically, your answer will drive the rest of the conversation and affect your perceived self-worth. We don't realize how great of an impact this question has. It is so subtle, but our identity gets completely wrapped-up in our profession and accomplishments. We have to constantly train ourselves to realize professional status and accomplishments only equal success from a worldly perspective. We place so much weight on defining who we are by what we are doing. Our pride kicks in and humility gets kicked out as our flesh takes over. We always try to impress the other person by providing the most juicy story about how we are God's gift to...you fill in the blank. For a long time I struggle with answering the, "What's your profession?" question with grace and wisdom. Then one day, I started answering it by saying, "I am in human resources. I am in search of people who need to be served" Lately, I have refined my professional title and consider myself a professional angler. This gets people's attention and tends to develop some very interesting conversations. People can't figure out why a professional angler is never wearing fishing gear.

Matthew 4:19
"Come, follow me," Jesus said, "and I will make you fishers of men."

Mark 1:17
"Come, follow me," Jesus said, "and I will make you fishers of men."

Austin Okomohwo, a friend from Nigeria who now is living in Ghana and serves Campus Crusade has some wisdom to share on this topic. I had a chance to catch-up with him recently in Downtown Orlando. I asked him what he thought the biggest challenge the United States faces is right now. In a caring way he said, "The US has a case of amnesia. It doesn't know who it is anymore. We saw a glimpse of its identity after 9-11; but, we have gone right back to status quo. The international community used to have clarity on the United States' plan and purpose. This is not the case anymore." What happened? How far does this spread into the depths of our society?

I would have to say this is one of the most critical challenges we face today as a society. Who are we as a country, community, family, and individual? The answer is not found in our heads, but our hearts. If your heart is aligned with God's agenda and not your own, you will have no problem answering who, what, where, when, why and how. You will feel secure and will have a clear identity if it is resting completely in Jesus Christ. If you don't have clarity or you don't feel secure in who you are, probably some more pruning needs to occur. Pray for clarity and recapture your identity.

But if the Spirit of Him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, He who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through His Spirit who dwells in you. - Romans 8:11

Starting a Relationship with God

Have you ever thought about inviting Christ into your life but you don't know how? Well, He makes it really easy. And, it was the best decision I have ever made in my life.

If you have never received Christ, or if you are unsure of your salvation, you can settle the issue right now. Would you like to receive Jesus Christ right now? God looks at the attitude and motives of your heart. If you sincerely desire to confess your sins, change the direction of your life by turning to God from self (repentance), and place your faith in Jesus Christ for salvation, then you can do so right now by expressing your desire to Him. Prayer is an excellent way to express yourself to God.

Here is a suggested prayer:
Lord Jesus, I need You in my life. I desire to experience Your love and forgiveness. I acknowledge I have sinned against You, and as a result, my life has not turned out the way I had planned. Thank You for dying on the cross for my sins. I open the door of my life and receive You by faith as my Savior and Lord. Thank You for forgiving my sins and for giving me eternal life. I now ask You to take control of my life and make me into the kind of person You want me to be. I pray You will let me experience the true meaning and purpose of life. Amen. - by Patrick M. Morley

Prayer: Getting Right with God

Acknowledgement - Father, I am a sinner. I have been controlling, unloving, angry, selfish, and judgmental at times. I have strayed from placing you at the center of my life. I have not acted in a manner that represented you well. Therefore, I may have lost the greatest gift you have given me besides my salvation, my wife.

Repentance - Father, I would like to take this opportunity to repent for my sins and my worldly ways. I only have a desire to be more like your son Jesus Christ.

Forgiveness - Father, please forgive me. I ask for your forgiveness and help to shed any of my flaws so I can walk in your presence. Help me be more gentle and loving to all those you place in my care. I don't deserve a 2nd, 3rd, 4th or...10th chance. Please have mercy on me.

Faith Requires Confidence

16 Rejoice always;
17 pray without ceasing;
18 in everything give thanks; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.

- 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 (NASB)

Conflict Resolution

We have all experienced conflict with a parent, spouse, girlfriend, boyfriend, child, relative, friend, and co-worker.

Some of us are blessed to grow-up with great models to follow for resolving conflict and some of us are not. Even if we did have a great model to follow, it does not mean the person you are dealing with has the same great model. This can cause a great deal of frustration when a conflict arises.

Ironically, we tend to do a better job resolving conflict with those least closest to us. Conversely, we have the most difficultly resolving conflict with those closest to us. Shouldn't it be the other way around? If we are emotionally connected to someone else, resolving conflicts should be easier. We should be more transparent, honest, and feel safer with the person closest to us. But, for some reason, our levels of trust get damaged along the way as our own individualized expectations are not met. In turn, disappointments seem to become more frequent as the relationship matures. Our emotional bank account ends-up gets depleted overtime. This ultimately leads to becoming desensitized to the other person. Why does this happen? First, we must understand what are the methods we typically use to deal with conflict?

Method 1: Avoidance
The first method of dealing with conflict is to shut down when feeling overwhelmed. This can be very frustrating to someone who is committed to getting their view point made and implemented.

Method 2: Denial
The second method of dealing with conflict is to deny conflict even exists. A person usually acts agreeable and accommodating in order to ensure peace and harmony. But, the issue never gets resolved resulting in pent-up anger and resentment.

Method 3: Emotionally
The third way of dealing with conflict is to approach it emotionally. Some people have a tendency to lash out and escalate their temperament to ensure their view point is heard and received. This method typically ends by attacking the person and not the issues at hand. Reality and facts are usually overlooked as fear and anger drive conversations.

Method 4: Logically
The forth way of dealing with contact is to concentrate on the facts. This method typically discounts the other person’s feelings and thought process all together.

In some cases, we tend to use a combination of these four methods.

So, how do you resolve conflict?

This requires us to consider one more method infrequently used.

Method 5: Spiritually
Whenever you face conflict, the first priority is to take a step back and pray together over the issue. If the other person is not willing to pray with you, pray on your own and ask for wisdom and humility to help deal with the issue(s) at hand. In addition, pray for the other person. Don't pray for them to see things your way. Pray they seek God for the answers as well. God is the only one who grants us the ability to resolve conflict properly. He can turn impossible situations to great relationship building opportunities. If for some reason there is still issues left on the table, ask a trusted and mutual God-fearing person or councilor to join the conversation to help navigate and mediate the issue(s). If this still does not result in an amicable resolution, involve your pastor and elders of your church as they tend to offer a great deal of wisdom and counsel from a Godly perspective.

Resolving conflict on your own is virtually impossible at times. We tend to cause lots of damage and hurt without even realizing it. Understand your communication limitations and try and not to attack the other person in the process. Typically both parties are right and the conflict can be resolved through humility, prayer, and involving the right Godly men and women.

Note: Women and men of God will always encourage you to stay with your husband or wife, unless physical abuse is being inflicted. They will help provide the navigation system to overcome difficult obstacles you might be facing. Moving on to find someone better or choosing to be alone is usually not the right answer. Why? Because the method of communication you are using to resolve conflict will not change with someone else. In addition, a great deal of regret, bondage, and brokenness is created from failed relationship which only gets cared over into new relationships. This may not show-up in the early stages of courtship, but methods of dealing with conflict will not change and eventually a repeat of this vicious cycle will occur. When two people are in a God fearing relationship, He will create the necessary harmony.

What is your method of resolving conflict? Have you tried method #5 yet? Try it out, and let me know what happens. God Bless!

Stand Firm

One of the five crowns God offers us is when we are able to stand firm in Him. So, how do we stand firm?

1) Rejoice
When we are faced with adversity we mush rejoice through the anxiety we feel. Rejoicing requires intentional discipline since the last thing we feel like doing is proactively helping ourselves feel better. But, this is all a part of the test in standing firm.

2) Gentleness
By rejoicing your heart can be transformed from hard to soft. A soft gentle heart is required for proper healing. Most importantly, in order to be the salt and light to others a gentle spirit is required.

3) Be Anxious for Nothing
Our flesh wants to control the outcome of all situations. But, the reality is we have no control. Only through prayer, supplication, and thanksgiving to God will the outcome end in our favor. However, it might not be what we want or think we want. Let go of control! He will always deliver if we stand firm.

4 Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice!

5 Let your gentle spirit be known to all men. The Lord is near.

6 Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.

7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
- Philippians 4:4-7 (NASB)

Transitions Are Never Easy

After graduating from MIT last summer, I anticipated new opportunities and challenges ahead. This was a major transition for me, but, I did not realize how major until now.

At the beginning of this new journey I thought my lifestyle was going to become more sophisticated and advanced since I was a graduate of MIT. I needed to be humbled. And, I was. I was brought back to my roots, spending the summer back in my hometown in New Jersey. While I was in New Jersey, I began to consider working in NYC as the next step. I also figured it was a great opportunity to help my mom transition into a more manageable home. Neither of these plans was executed. After months of deliberation, I found myself using the time to learn how to sail. I spent many hours on the Hudson River sailing in-between New York City and Jersey City. It was an experience I will never forget. The most memorable moment was engaging in a race with 25 other sail boats. Talk about fun! Our team won by just a few feet in the last 50 yards of the race.

Also during the summer, I began to revisit the idea of working with some very close friends (brothers) of mine. At the end of July, Paul Roldan and I planned to move forward with merging our efforts and launching Allgen Financial Services, Inc. in September of 2006. Allgen was created to implement a complete paradigm shift within a very mature industry. As most other financial institutions are focused on serving only the wealthy, we decided to focus on implementing a business plan which would allow us to serve across generations and socioeconomic backgrounds. This became an exciting challenge for us to pursue. We wanted to have a significant kingdom minded purpose and we received one.

September turned out to be an eventful month. It was filled to both personal and professional promises. On September 18th, I finally found the woman I have dreamed about since I was a little boy. Her southern accent melted my heart. It was the sweetest voice I have ever heard. I immediately knew she was, "The One", without even seeing what she looked like in person. For 1-month, we spoke on the phone for countless hours learning more about each other as friends. The alignment of our thoughts, values, and belief system was scary.

At the same time I began ramping-up efforts at Allgen, and starting a new personal relationship, a long awaited opportunity with World Vision came to fruition. Since I knew my experience as an MIT Sloan Fellow was to be used for ministry purpose on a global scale, I had to explore working with an established visionary and internationally-based ministry focused on children's aid. This part of the journey brought me to Seattle, Washington. During my tenure at World Vision, I was exposed to a fantastic group of Godly men and women. Many special moments were shared with the World Vision team. The most memorable ones were during Wednesday morning services held on premise. In addition, the projects we tackled had great potential to revolutionize how interaction occurs between donors, internal staff, and the field.

While I was at World Vision, I was also courting Bari in Nashville. I will never forget the first time I saw her. She came to pick me up at the Nashville airport. She was the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. I have never been to Nashville; therefore, I did not know what to expect as a Yankee. I figured Honky Tonks was something I better plan on attending. Our first date occurred at a Dolly Parton concert. So, I really had some adjusting to do. Actually, to my pleasant surprise, Nashville is much different than I expected. Within 3-months after meeting Bari, I decided to propose to this beautiful Southern Belle. On her 30th birthday, I asked her to marry me. She said, "Yes". It was the happiest moment of my life. We planned on getting married on June 30, 2007.

After spending several months at World Vision, I was called to pickup where I left off at Allgen. Instead of moving to Orlando, I moved to Nashville to further develop my relationship with Bari. I purposefully wanted to engage in some hardcore premarital counseling. I was excited about closing the distance gap between Bari and I. Also, I was excited about the new surroundings, friendships, and culture Nashville had to offer. During the next several months, Bari and I would share some great memories together. We also encountered some challenges with our differences in personality, background, and communication style. Who ever knew men and women think differently? All of a sudden, we found ourselves facing all kinds of challenges. Before you can blink an eye, we were no longer engaged to be married on June 30th. I have never been so sad in my life. Some people might say we got engaged too fast; in turn, we did not know each other well enough. However, I don't regret one moment or decision. I know the Lord was involved in all the decisions made. I am grateful God has introduced me to Bari. I am confident God has a plan to put us back together. This is where prayer and my faith in Christ play a powerful role.

Most recently, my mom fractured her knee. This required emergency surgery and a trip back to New Jersey for at least the next month or two. Thank God for my great friends and business partners at Allgen. Jason Martin and Paul Roldan, thank you for all your support.

It has been almost exactly 1-year from when this chapter in my life began. It has been filled with all kinds of challenges, fun events, excitement, and heartache one can ever imagine. What's next?