Cancer Killed by Love

I recently received the following story in an email and thought it was worth sharing.

Yesterday I had a pretty severe "Mohs" surgery on the left side of my face! Yes, it turns out that a lifetime of surfing comes with a downside. Having my face directly exposed to the sun for five decades is a lot like sticking your head in a microwave. When I started surfing in the 1960's, there was no such thing as sun block. Coppertone was for sissies. So I was tattooed with non-malignant skin cancer on my left temple which if untreated would take over my face like a wine stain on a white linen napkin.

My doctor explained that the surgery would take place in several rounds. Each time 2 millimeters of skin is removed and examined in a lab. The face scraping continues until all the bad-boy cancer cells are removed.

The lab time between each "mowing" is 2 to 3 hours. The doctor said 3 to 4 rounds of surgery are common. So the actual surgeries are brief, but the waiting in between time is eternal. They told me to pack a lunch. Since this was virtually an all day commitment, I showed up with a briefcase full of work to pass the time and boundless optimism that all of this would be nothing more than a flesh wound. I felt like Jack Bauer. No problem.

Round One went as expected. But 2 hours later the lab results revealed that the cancer was much bigger under the skin than on the surface. What was going to be nickel-sized lawn on my face turned into a silver-dollar size cancer estate complete with potential nerve damage and skin grafts and sagging eyebrow. My Clint Eastwood evaporated into Napoleon Dynamite.

Fortunately, my wife was sitting next to me. I had insisted she not wait with me. I had my work you see. This was nothing I had told her. "I'll call you when it's over." She knew better. When she senses things my logic doesn't see, she doesn't argue; she just does what she must. She doesn't ask my permission. So she waited with me. When I came out of the surgery room with a big pressure bandage on my head after learning of the global nature of the gang of terrorist cancer cells, she gave me her "love look" and closed her eyes and took my hand. I could feel her prayers. I could fill her grace. And finally, I could feel her confidence. We went outside and went for a walk. In her powerful, quiet way, she reassured me. I am lucky to have a wife whose fierce loyalty is irrational. If my face sagged like a bag of sand and I became clinically depressed, she would be at my side. Not out of duty or guilt, but out of grade-A, 100% pure love. She is my constant compassionate cheerleader.

Today there are a growing number of people who insist human beings are noting more than bodies. That what we call love is simply brain chemistry. But on days like yesterday, it seems like some eyes are tightly closed, and not able to see truth. Real love is beyond the feeling of love. In moments like yesterday that gives meaning and reason for everything.

Oh yes, the second round of "mowing" cut out all those pesky, perverted cells. I was clear! I got 30 stitches and no nerve damage. That's of course great, but not the point. I am old enough to know that a loving wife and heart-felt prayers don't always result in getting what we want. My dad died of cancer in spite of my mother's constant prayers and loving attention and in spite of my younger brother's heroic help. The point is, there is something more to real love than our material selves. Through adversity we experience life in a way that confirms we are human because of our spirit not because of our body. Perhaps this is the reason we have such moments. Love. Without it there is no happiness. With it there is no emptiness.

Will Marre

Faith Requires Confidence

16 Rejoice always;
17 pray without ceasing;
18 in everything give thanks; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.

- 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 (NASB)

Managing Intensity

Jesus was an intense man. Amen! For good reason, He came to earth to carryout a significant plan and purpose. However, being intense is not always what is required in all situations. Being able to be kind, gentle, and peaceful is important too. A peaceful spirit is a sign of someone who has a close relationship with the Lord. At the same time, a person with vibrance and fire for doing God's work is equally important. Passion can sometimes overshadow a peaceful spirit.

I went out the other night with some friends. A husband and wife who have been married for over 14 years joined us. The husband was driving all of us to an event. He became irritated since he was having trouble finding the entrance way to the parking lot. His temperament rose very abruptly and the speed of the car increased drastically. His wife who was sitting in the passenger seat noticed her husband's intensity over the situation was getting overheated. She leaned over, put her hand on his shoulder, and said with the sweetest voice, "Everything is fine honey. We will get their in plenty of time." The husband's entire being was transformed to a much more peaceful state. Everyone in the car began to feel very much at ease.

A valuable lesson is learned from this experience. In most relationships, the significant other's intensity level usually rises to match the person who is being intense. Instead, there was great power in the way this situation was handled. It was a demonstration of how we have the ability to intensify or defuse a situation just by the approach we take with each other. A great question to always ask ourselves when dealing with intense situations, WWJD = What Would Jesus Do?

Developing a Plan for Your Life

I have heard this so many times, but I really needed to hear it today. If you want to make God laugh, tell Him your plans. If you are anything like me, you find yourself creating plans only to have them completely altered. A wise man in one of my bible studies in Celebration, Florida once said, "I wish God would through me some curve balls. I feel like I have been given this perfect life with no hurricanes or tornados to challenge my world. I wish He would be so kind and shake things up a little bit." On one hand, I really envy him. I am constantly praying to see a glimpse of what his life is like. But, in reality there was a great lesson learned by what he was saying. You really are not growing unless you are challenged. Change = Challenge. A life with little or no challenges can be the ultimate curse verses blessing. In baseball, you can't become a better 3rd baseman unless a million balls are hit at you and your chest becomes black and blue. As much as I plead with God to stop throwing me curve balls, I know He has my best interest at heart. I also know His plan is always better than mine. It always has been; therefore, I have reason to believe it always will be. So, if someone ever asks you, "do you have a plan?" The best answer to give, "Yes, I am on God's plan". You might sound lost and unsettling because this is not the answer people are looking for when they asking you the "What's your plan question". But, everything else is truly meaningless unless your plan entails His directions. Unfortunately, His timing does not always match your expectations or desires. This means you have to be focused and steadfast in your faith knowing He will revieal His plan when the time is right. Which plan are you on, God's or your own?

Developing a plan with God
Here are some steps to take in order to make this happen.

1) Find a place where you can truly feel His presence and pray with God. Ask Him to reveal what His plans are on a micro or macro level.

2) If you are at peace with not having a plan, you are probably on the right track, especially if you are the type of person who needs everything perfectly in order. This usually means you are able to feel God's grace and hand in your life. However, this does not give you the right to be lazy. You need to constantly be seeking His plan. But only on His time, He will give you some clues or reveal what His plans are during the course of your journey. When you get your marching orders, be passionate and bold.

3) Don't be afraid to interact with others and see if God is speaking to you through them. Godly men and women will never make you feel ashamed for being venerable and not having all the answers. In all reality, anyone who thinks they have the answer is the person who has no clue. I sometimes think I have all the answers. This is when I need to check myself or have someone else check me so I can realize again how clueless I am.

Resource: Interview with God

Bible Reference (NASB): Isaiah 8
Isaiah 8:9-10

9"Be broken, O peoples, and be shattered;
And give ear, all remote places of the earth.
Gird yourselves, yet be shattered;
Gird yourselves, yet be shattered.
10"Devise a plan, but it will be thwarted;
State a proposal, but it will not stand,
For God is with us.